Archive for March, 2010

The Obligitory Post About Health Care

Since I have a blog, it is required by law for me to give my 2 cents on the health care reform bill that just passed. My main thought is:

GEEZ IT’S ABOUT FREAKING TIME!!!

It’s modeled after the system we have here in this great Bay State, which I’m fairly happy with. I mean, I have health insurance and that’s pretty rad. I wouldn’t have it if I lived anywhere else (oh, except maybe any other developed nation). Of course, the insurance companies are still going to get rich off of the pain and misery of others, but hey– that’s what capitalism is all about! At least they won’t be able to exclude people from getting insurance because of pre-existing conditions… after 2014 (kids after this September). Basically, I don’t think it does enough, and it’s going to make insurance companies even richer because now it’s going to be mandatory that everyone have coverage which means millions of more people on the rosters at insurance companies.

Yeah, it’s pretty scary all the Tea party people being lame and freaks shouting racial slurs at old Civil Rights activists and that poll that says that 14% of the population thinks that Obama is the Anti-Christ (I question the methodology), but I’m getting sick of the media sensationalizing it all. I think people will calm the fuck down once they start reaping the benefits from the bill, or if it doesn’t affect them, at least seeing that Obama isn’t going to put them in a concentration camp for being Christian, like what Pat Robertson thought back in the 90s:

just like what Nazi Germany did to the Jews, so liberal America is now doing to the evangelical Christians. It’s no different. It is the same thing. It is happening all over again. It is the Democratic Congress, the liberal-based media and the homosexuals who want to destroy the Christians. Wholesale abuse and discrimination and the worst bigotry directed toward any group in America today. More terrible than anything suffered by any minority in history.

— Pat Robertson

Yeah, because all the gays who work for the NY Times are actually spending their time herding Christians into death camps and making lamps out of their skin. Yup!

I really don’t get all the Hitler-Obama comparisons either. I’ve been trying to find someplace where someone says why exactly Obama is like Hitler, and I’m not finding anything, just a lot of people saying “Obama is like Hitler.”

For example:

This pretty much says Obama is like Hitler because both had rallies and people like them. Uh…. ok then. Because nobody ever got emotional or liked, say, Ronald Reagan or Brad Pitt or anything. They both must be Hitler too!


Obama’s secret plan: to disband the Boy Scouts! Just like Hitler did!

There’s one that goes farther and says that both Hitler and Obama came to power during an economic depression. So does that make FDR like Hitler too? This article says that lots of Nazis were homosexual. Uh, didn’t this person, who did a report on Hitler know that gays were also sent to the concentration camps? Hence the pink triangle symbol?

Argh. I’m going to stop this. None of this is based on anything!

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March 29, 2010 at 3:31 am 1 comment

Riches Abound!

So I sold that Polaroid camera for $126 + $40 shipping to some dude in Holland. I sold it THE VERY DAY that they started selling Polaroid film again. Oh well, I guess I’m glad to have another thing out of the house. Yay! I put my Timex Sinclair up on eBay and it’s already at $50 with 5 days left of the auction. At the rate I’m going I’ll be able to… buy lots more yoghurt at Hole Foods!

THIS T.M.I. MOMENT BROUGHT TO YOU BY ANAEROBIC BACTERIA

Yes, I have an infection *down there*. It’s not a very bad one, just kind of annoying. When you’re a chick, stuff like this happens– you have all sorts of different types of bacteria living in Those Regions, and normally they live in a nice delicate balanced harmony where they all hold flagellae (do bacteria even have those?) and sing Kum-Ba-Ya over roasting little bacterial marshmallows. Sometimes, however, something pisses them off and the mean bacteria beat up on the friendly bacteria and begin to rule your Parts. Thus you have to give pep talks to the friendly bacteria so they can take over and win control again. If you go to a doctor, he or she will most likely give you antibiotics which will kill all the bacteria, friend and foe, and thus leave it up to fate who will prevail and rule your Cooter once more. I prefer the alternative method, which is eat a metric buttload (or rather twatload as the case may be) of plain live culture yogurt which replenishes your friendly bacteria supply, cut down on sugar (that’s what the mean bacteria eat) and drink unsweetened cranberry juice. Yick. However, this fits in nicely with the My-Stomach-Is-Killing-Me diet and this is why I’m buying way overpriced yogurt at Hole Foods. Why Hole Foods? Because that place is so freaking expensive it’s like a giant hole you pour cash into in order to get a tiny amount of food out. This yogurt is AWESOME though. I’ve been eating it with the particularly hippie kind of granola that you get in bulk (whole grains are good for all sorts of stomach and cootchie related things) and damn it’s tasty. You can never take the Ithacan out of me I guess.

On the new car front, I went to get it inspected and lo and behold… it needed FOUR FUCKING NEW ROTORS!!! WTF?!?!? If you are not stupid, you should NEVER have to change rotors. If you change the brake pads in a timely manner, your rotors will stay beautiful forever. Why then did a guy who was supposedly a Volkswagen mechanic sell me a car with FOUR rotors with deep rusty gouges in them? Grrr. I will never know. I had to have them fixed that day too, because you only get 7 days to get your car inspected after you transfer the registration and Wednesday was my last day to do it. Otherwise, changing rotors is pretty straightforward– you can get them cheap at a junkyard and do them yourself (I did this to the purple car years ago because of its stupid congenital brake problem which no mechanic ever believed existed). The hot Lebanese car repair guy said that the rest of the car looked great, though, so with any luck I will not have to get anything fixed for a long long time. Let’s hope.

March 27, 2010 at 4:56 am Leave a comment

What’cha doin’, Kevin?

1. lookin far da saycret oirish ingraydient
2. WTF is this a reference to?
3. Oh yeah I think I vaguely remember that
4. you, Scooter have no life

It was from an Irish Spring soap commercial sometime in the 90s– I was looking for it on YouTube but alas I couldn’t find it. Anyway, Beannachtaí na Féile Phádraig!

Today was gorgeous! It was in the 60s! this is so awesome, especially since we had 4 days of torrential downpour and flooding. After going to job #2 I spent the day at the DMV! Woo-hoo! Anyway, I got my new car all registered n stuff. I sent away for a replacement title for old Carlos so I can officially be rid of him.

Then I attempted to clean my room and decided to sell some stuff on eBay. I’ve never actually sold anything there before, so this was a new and different experience. I’m trying to unload an old Polaroid Land Camera (complete with box of neatly packed accessories that I doubt have ever been used) as well as my Timex Sinclair computer + 8 cartridges. This is bizarrely nerve-wracking. Within a few hours of posting the camera, a dude emailed me and offered me $25 if I’d sell it to him right away. Somehow I think I might be able to get more for it than that. I mean, it’s not just the camera. All the gadgets are packed in their original boxes in the big rainbow-printed Polaroid box and the instruction manuals look like they have never seen the light of day. I declined his offer. I haven’t actually listed the computer yet. Do I sell it with the cartridges? Do I sell them in a lot of 8 or individually? Do I sell them in 2 lots because there are 3 cartridges and 5 cassette tapes? Do I sell them in sets of unopened vs. opened (2 cartridges and one cassette are still unopened)? Too much figuring.

I still have no idea what I’m going to begin asking for the 1932 edition of Mein Kampf (in original German of course). I inherited it from Moth’s old creepy boyfriend, lest you think I’m some sort of crazy Germanophile Nazi. I’m also pondering selling this Felix The Cat stuffed animal from the 1930s or 40s– it’s really cool, but doesn’t stand up by itself and you can’t really play with it because it’s fragile. I’m sure someone else could give it a much better home. I’m enjoying the thought of liberating myself from all this stuff I’ve been schlepping around from house to house for the past 20 years, but the actual getting rid of it part is turning out to be really annoying. Some stuff is too valuable to just dump off at the Goodwill, but I don’t have the energy to do all the necessary research to figure out what it’s worth!

March 18, 2010 at 4:47 am 1 comment

the Oscars – WTF?

As it is painfully obvious, I am no good judge of fashion. If anyone who was at the Oscars last night could see me on a normal day in my stripey sweater and jeans, they would probably go into cardiac arrest on the spot. But, like everyone else in the country, I got to be a fashion expert for 3.5 hours last night. All I can say is WTF?!? Everyone was wearing these one-shouldered dresses that look like someone sewed the dust ruffle from the grandmother’s bed onto a bunch of bandages.
<img src="” alt=”” />

Many of them were fishtail-shaped


which I don’t think looks good on anyone. Most of the dresses were either a non-color like beige-ish or almost-peach which made the wearers look totally washed out,

my least-favorite shade of blue (the shade plastic objects come in when there has to be an assortment of color choices)


or bright red.


The bright red was Ok, but it was very patriotic looking when the camera panned over the audience and you saw Red, white-ish hues and Blue. Plus, everyone was wearing this bright reddish orange lipstick that was kind of annoying, especially when paired with the non-color shades of blah.

Sarah Jessica Parker looked notoriously hideous:

So that’s my 2 cents on this year’s fashion. Now onto the movies…

Sandra Bullock won for Best Actress. really, come on. SANDRA BULLOCK? She beat Helen Mirren and Meryl Streep! I guess maybe she’s being rewarded for being in a serious movie for once (I didn’t actually see it; I can’t judge– it looked like a heartwarming sports movie and I avoid those like the plague), but still. She’s one of my least favorite actors. OK whatever.

Nothing else struck me particularly one way or the other, except for the fact that Bea Arthur was noticeably absent from the Look Who Died Last Year montage. Everyone has pointed out that she’s mostly been in TV and not in movies, but come on. Michael Jackson, though he was in a couple of movies (Captain) Eons ago, is not known for his acting career and he got recognized! Poor Bea. She was the awesomest. I’m going to have a Bea Arthur party.

bea arthur

March 8, 2010 at 8:07 pm 1 comment

hasta la vista, Carlos!

I finally decided the time has come to say goodbye to Carlos, my little 1991 Civic. It seems decadent and lame to ditch a car because you are sick of it, but I made a list of things that are annoying about it and I think it’s OK in this circumstance. I’m possibly going to sell it to Pete for $200, Which is awesome because I’ll be able to get rid of it, won’t have to haggle with strangers, AND did I mention get rid of it? Faster even than if I had to talk to people on Craig’s List (assuming someone would even want it) and bargain and stuff.

The problem is, everything that makes the car go or stop works fine. It’s just everything else that sucks. Here are some of the highlights:

http://listography.com/scootronimus/products/stuff_that_bugs_me_about_my_car

With that I bought a new car yesterday! Or rather, i put a deposit on a car and I will pick it up on Wednesday. It’s a 1999 Volkswagen Golf. It’s EXACTLY the kind of car I wanted! It’s a small fuel-efficient hatchback with a manual transmission and no power windows! The guy who is selling it works at a Volkswagen dealership and has fixed everything that normally goes wrong with Golfs (Golves?). It’s shiny and new, and everything under the hood is shiny and new. It’s incredible! I am totally psyched. Murphy’s Law says that “if it sounds too good to be true, it most likely is” I know, and I didn’t get a second opinion and none of my rental penises were available to talk about manly stuff with the owner. The dude had other people interested, so I put a deposit down then. I drive a car so little that if there’s something major wrong with it, I probably won’t notice or find out for a while anyway. When I drove the car, it handled beautifully, sounded perfect and there were no problems there. Did I mention I’m psyched?

I’m really glad I didn’t have to shop around more. I really hate shopping for cars. Yay!

I’ve owned 4 cars in my life and every time I have to say good bye to one I feel slightly nostalgic and a little sad. Of course, every other car I’ve had has just died or been wrecked unexpectedly. Now, however, I am not the least bit sad to see Carlos go; it’s such a pain in my butt it will be a great weight off my shoulders!

March 8, 2010 at 7:55 pm Leave a comment


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