This week needs to bite me (and then get a time out)
In the USA we start the week with Sunday, so I’ll begin there. I had made a plan to go to Lil’ Bitch’s house and we were going to check out a new ice cream place. I sent him an email asking when I should come over. I also called him. I got no reply. Now I know that he doesn’t get cellphone reception in his apartment. However, would it have killed him to walk 2 blocks so he did and tell me not to come over? Also, he now has the innernets in his apartment, so he could have emailed me back. Thus I spent all Sunday waiting around for him. When I got fed up, around 3 or 4, I called up Terrence to see if he wanted to do some porch drinking because it was a good day for such an activity. He said sure (when is he ever not up for drinking?), but he had an errand to run and he’d call me when he got back. Of course he never did. So I spent all day waiting for stupid dudes.
Oh yeah, insurance. It turns out that I didn’t need to wait for a hearing, nor did I need to re-apply. All I need to do is fax a copy of my pay stub to some insurance office. For some reason, they had me down as working at Newbury Comics, but not for Jack and Laura anymore. WTF? It took me long enough to find this out, too. I had to be on hold like 15 different times by cranky people and be transferred to 10 different robots before I got an actual person. Her name was Tawneesha and she freaking RULED. She was nice and she gave me information that was actually useful! However, I still don’t have insurance and my emergency supply of drugs that I got from Lil Bitch’s ex will run out in 2 days.
The kid has been a little hellspawned demon all week, too. He is ten times clingier than usual. He won’t let me do anything that means I am not giving him my 100% undivided attention. However, if I stop, say, reading a book or sitting more than 3 feet away from him and play with him, all he wants to do is bite, pinch, scratch and hit me. He’s not allowed to do these things; each infraction results in a 5-minute time out. Or rather, 5 minutes of him screaming bloody murder until I let him out of the playpen. At this point, he is PISSED and what does he do when he’s pissed? He scratches, hits, pinches and bites of course! Thus the cycle repeats itself. Today he smacked me really hard in the eye with a tupperware container. It did not tickle. Monday he wanted to go outside, but when I took him outside it was too hot and he wanted to go back in. Of course, once inside he got bored and wanted to go back out. Today he took pleasure in earnestly requesting peas (his favorite food of the moment is frozen peas which he even sprinkled on his oatmeal this morning) and then making eye contact, smiling, and dramatically dumping them all over the floor. He’s also falsely been reporting stinky diapers and biting not hard enough to be a real bite, just enough so he can look at me and see what I’m going to do about it. He has been similarly testing me with pinching. I just feel like no matter what I do, I am the enemy. I know the kid is barely a year and a half old, and that’s what kids that age do, but I don’t like feeling like I’m the evil arch-nemesis who must be defeated at all costs. I’ve tried many different approaches to no avail.
I’m roasting right now because the baby next door was crying all evening and it was setting off my baby-alert system so much I had to close the window so I didn’t hear it! I have 3 brains cells whose only function it is to listen for the sound of an unhappy baby in another room (i.e., waking up from a nap, getting into trouble) and I can’t turn them off. They got enough of a workout today with the Little Dude as unhappiness was his main mode, and my brain cells were just tuckered out and my nerves were on edge! I feel bad that he’s so cranky and miserable all the time. I mean, it’s my job to keep him happy. When he’s being an antagonistic little bastard, not only is it kind of irritating, but I also feel like I’m failing as a care-giver (side note: why are caregivers and caretakers pretty much the same thing?)!
We went to the park today and he got really excited about the geese that were hanging out there. “Geese” is a word he can say. He can say 4 words besides “mama” and “dada”, but 2 of them can mean myriad different things (“up” can only mean “up”. “Ka” for “car” usually means only “car,” but when he’s happy he shrieks “ka ka ka!” and when he’s pissed, he growls “kaaaa kaaaaa kaaaaa”)The one that sounds sort of like “Deesh” or “Jish” can be: this, fish, cheese, juice, shoes, toast, toes, sheep, and dish (I think he’s saying “dish”– he likes to play in the dishwasher, maybe that’s where he picked up “dish?” he kept picking up a bowl and saying that). The other word “ees” can be: teeth, please and peas. Now it includes “geese”! Everything with wings was “geese” today– it was cute.
I suppose my week hasn’t been a total loss so far. Monday was hot and sticky and gross, so when I got home from work I put on my bathing suit, got a plate of grapes mixed up a seabreeze and lolled in the pool with my library book. It was freaking AWESOME!
However, my house is so disgusting I can barely stand being in it. It’s really gross in here. It’s so bad that every time I try to clean it I just get discouraged so it just gets worse. Really, it’s like a crazy person lives here. this is the kind of house where you find old ladies who have been dead for a month with cats chewing on their corpses. And speaking of cats, stupid fucking Morrissey has taken to peeing on everything. WTF? I changed cat litters– I got the eco-friendly kind that’s made of pine chips that’s more absorbent than the normal kind. Apparently it’s unacceptable. Grrr.